[imagiηary] superstaя *
Don’t Knock Exit Doors

AIRLINE | CANADA

(A passenger is sitting in the emergency exit row. We’re required by law to brief them on the operation of the window exit. One of the instructions is to ‘throw the exit door out’.)

Me: “Do you have any questions for me on the operation of this door?”

Passenger: “Yes, there’s something I’ve always wondered. When you throw the door out, where does it go?”

Me: “It just goes outside. It doesn’t matter where it ends up. Just throw it out and get out.”

Passenger: “Well, what if it hits somebody?”

Me: “You’d be the first one out, so it’s not going to hit anybody.”

Passenger: “What if there’s some guy hiking?”

Me: “Sir, if there’s some guy hiking where we’ve just crash landed a plane, I’m sure he’s got bigger problems than a door hitting him.”

Remember this?

277: love, love me do.

277: love, love me do.

The crap we put up with getting on and off an airplane.

OMG, it’s all so true.

The crap we put up with getting on and off an airplane.

OMG, it’s all so true.

Embrace Life.

Not Quite Streets Ahead
GROCERY STORE | USA
(I am checking out a customer and taking their details.)
Me: “Ma’am, what is your street name?”
Customer: “I don’t really have one of those. I usually just go by Shanice.”
Me: “Uh, ma’am, I meant the street name where you live.”
Customer: “Oh, I knew that!”
279: feed me, seymour.

279: feed me, seymour.

There’s an app for that.